Top lessons to learn from failed relationships.
“Not all relationships last forever, and this is very painful. But the wonderful thing to appreciate is these failed relationships teach you lessons which are valuable and very important for your life.”
These are some top lessons that you need to understand and make use of them in your life to prevent suffering and become wise enough to handle any relationship failures that may happen in your life.
Have no expectations on others: Stop expecting so much from others. Stop expecting others to change their behavior. Stop telling them how to be and what to do. Even though you are saying for their good, they don’t want to change because they want freedom and want to experience everything on their own. So never expect from others and give them freedom and let them experience things on their own and let them learn lessons for life.
You become strong by failing and by facing pain: When relationships are broken, you will suffer great pain, but this pain helps you become stronger once you learn to handle it. Pain in failed relationships is for sure, but suffering or not is your choice.
You will understand life and suffering: When you succeed you will understand and learn only about happiness. But when you fail, you will learn your life more deeply and you will understand people and you will understand situations and the suffering because of them.
You will understand self-love: You love others and it may fail, but self-love is very important before you love someone else. Self-love never fails you. Instead, it helps you in self-awareness and it helps you live a joyful life.
The pain caused can be used to grow or shrink life: Pain is the outcome of any failure in life. This pain has the power to destroy and build. Either it can build you into a robust person or it can demolish you. It depends on how you want to use your pain.
Never beg someone to love you: Love is a feeling and it should happen naturally. If you beg someone to be in a relationship, it’s useless. Such relationships will not last forever. So beg no one to be in a relationship ever.
You will learn to let go: You may be clinging to several emotions and feelings in you and this gives you suffering. But as time passes, you will learn to let go of emotions that are related to people who left you. This lesson will help you even in other areas of life so well.
You need to control your feelings and emotions: When you are in a relationship, your feelings and emotions are controlling you and that’s the reason why you will feel sad deeply. But after relationships fail, you will understand the importance of controlling emotions rather than being controlled by them.
Never stay in any relationship without love: Many people stay in a relationship without love. But these relationships give you pain, not happiness. It’s better to end such relationships. These relationships are based on “what will I get from this relationship type.”
Trust no one blindly: Most relationships fail because of blind trust in others. You trust someone so easily and deeply without any thinking and this leads to failure. Such relations bring you great pain as trust is broken. So never trust anyone blindly.
Never make your happiness rely on others: You get happiness from your family and society, but the same family and society cause sadness in you. Therefore, you need to stop making your happiness depend on others. Be happy always.
Never allow others to mistreat you: When someone is making use of you or mistreating you in any relationship. You need to realize that the relationship is toxic and selfish. You need to end such relationship and prevent pain in your life.
Ego and over possessiveness is harmful: You may care about your ego more than your love for someone. You may be thinking of your loved ones to stick to you all the time without giving any importance to others. You may hate your partner for being close to others. But this is bad, and it’s the cause of several relationship failures. Let your loved ones be given the freedom and give them your trust and love.
Never stay in a relationship forcibly: There are several reasons why people stay in a relationship. You may be expecting something from the relationship and such relationship is conditional and valueless. You may not want them to hurt them or you may be scared or you may be in a relationship because your friends are in it. If the reason for your relationship is not love, then never be in it.
Never be in a relationship with someone who makes you lose yourself: You may be trying to change yourself to fit other's life. You may be trying so hard to be not you. You may be suffering because of it. But a genuine relationship never expects a change in you. It accepts you the way you are, and it expects only love and care. If you are losing yourself, then it’s better to lose the relationship than losing yourself.
Nothing lasts forever in life and these relationships too: You may be expecting someone to stay in your life forever, but it won’t be possible. Nobody stays forever. One of you has to leave the other because of some reason for sure. You can never tell whose life ends first, even in a genuine relationship.
These relationships are conditional: Nowadays most relationships are conditional. They are based on monetary expectations. Such relationships are nothing more than businesses and some of these businesses are successful and some are failures.
Time heals everything: When a relationship fails, it doesn’t mean your life is ended. Initially, it looks like you lost everything and you have nothing left in your life to appreciate but relax and think about what you got in your life. In what ways you are better than others. This thinking gives you hope. This thinking may not relieve your grief, but it can heal you slowly. Be grateful to what you have been left with and never lose hope and this time heals everything in everyone’s life.
